One of the very first blogs I ever posted was about my perfectionistic tendencies.
The first podcast was about the same thing. I have this driving need inside of me for things to be as they “should” be. I hold this belief that everything can be perfect if I just put in the work. This belief is, of course, delusional, and becomes suicidal when writing a daily blog and having an email list that sends you a notification every single time someone unsubscribes, pouring all your blood and sweat into the gutter.
Not really, but that’s how my mind experiences it.
I’ve only had two unsubscribers so far, which seems pretty lucky. Granted, it’s two on a small list, but it could be must worse.
There is always a problem headed our way when we outsource our sense of peace or how we feel about ourselves. It is always dangerous to put these things in the hands of others, but we are always doing that in some small way when we put anything out there for other people judge and criticize. This goes beyond more than blogs and podcasts. We are doing it every time we raise a point in a meeting or make a suggestion to the group.
It is important to remember that a person liking or disliking or supporting or criticizing something tells us about them, not the thing. It tells us what they thought of it, what their perspective was, and little more.
This doesn’t mean that everything we do is awesome. I am often unhappy with the quality or depth of a post, but that is the nature of blogging daily. I have learned to reign my language in a little and be less abrasive. I try to make sure this is useful every day.
I’m not perfect, but subscribers and unsubscribers cannot be what drives how I feel about myself.
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I write, podcast and make videos about living in freedom through mindfulness, intentionality, compassion, and equanimity.
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